Telka's tools- Anxiety, Panic, PTSD and OCD

Let’s start with a clarification, are you asking about an emotion or a brain disease? Anxiety is a normal human emotion used to label our feelings when something is daunting, nerve wracking or even frightening. Unfortunately, these words are also used to describe brain diseases ranging from mild to severe mood disorders. These brain diseases are commonly referred to as mental illness and impact about 25% of the adults in the U.S.  Severe mental illness represents less than 6% of the adults in the U.S.  Testing will solve the mystery of what are normal anxious emotions and what are indications of mental illnesses. Use the tests in "Tool #4 Testing, Testing, Testing" on this page to identify mood disorders' symptoms, severity and duration. Discuss your test results with your healthcare provider.  

Bottom line: Differences between normal emotions and symptoms of mental illness:

1. Emotions come and go while symptoms of mood disorders/brain disease remain consistently troublesome for a minimum of 2 to 4 weeks and may also include additional physical symptoms.  Using a mood tracker may help with this distinction.

2. Uncomfortable emotions improve with distractions and vacations, while mood disorders, like broken bones and infections, continue to cause discomfort even after a winning lottery ticket.

3. Mental illness, like other brain diseases, may disrupt sleep, energy levels, pain sensitivity, inflammation, digestion, appetite, motivation, concentration, memory, focus and mood. 

4. Depressed and anxious emotions may respond well to healthy lifestyle, good coping skills and social support. Brain diseases may also respond well to healthy lifestyle, good coping skills and social support, however, just like any damaged organ, the brain needs time to repair and heal. Recovery from brain disease is not as swift as recovery from the normal fight, flight or freeze, stress responses. 

5. For additional clarification, check out the depression and anxiety videos as well as the stress materials on this site and speak directly with your health care provider.

Check out the “Creating Best Results” pdf on this site.  In addition to those 20 tips, I also suggest that you take responsibility for your emotions.  Use the map, it’s your journey and your choice of destination.  You are welcome to use all the tools, videos and resources on this site with the therapist of your choice. 

"Worry about everything" has a huge toolkit of options.

1. A meeting with your family physician to discuss the need for a psychiatric consult is helpful for people with complex medical conditions, sleep disorders, chronic pain, addictions, ADHD, and severe mental illness such as bipolar and psychotic disorders

2. Using the list in Creating Best Results, evaluate the lifestyle or health issues that may cause a racing mind and delayed, interrupted or disturbed sleep. Check for problems with caffeine and  sleep hygiene. Creating Best Results recommendations include effective strategies such as meditation, mindful breathing, journaling, and mind-calming apps … are you willing to try any of those options? 

3. Coping tools on this site to help you work through your worry:

· Identify source of worry- is it reason/logic mind, wise mind, emotional mind? 

· What data supports your worries? Reality check—are the worries true or distorted thoughts?

· Is this worry in or out of your control? Work through worries using the map

· Transform the worry into wisdom.

· Reframe the thoughts that keep you awake at night using the Ladder Tool

· Stress Prevention Tests

· Understanding the difference between worry, anxiety and fear may be useful

· To address that worry loop keeping you awake, use the Finish the Sentence Tool

· Stop “Shoulding” on Yourself Tool 

· Still stuck with obsessive thoughts? Try the Sticky Brain 20/20/20 tool

Let's address this worry with a reality check—(run the math.) What financial data supports your worries? Financial worries based on facts are a smart concern, not a worry problem. Address real financial concerns with assistance from resources and supports. Consider use of the public library, employer based financial advisors, friends with money management skills, legal advice, retirement planning, social services, and community programs.  Remain open to whatever resources, supports, entitlements and information is available.

Resources 

Michigan 211 

GreenPath 

Debtors Anonymous 

Suzy Orman, 

Dave Ramsey, 

Tools: If the reality check proves that your finances are stable and your worry is a distorted thought, then use the tools listed in FAQ #3 "Worry about everything" to work through your worry.

Poor time management skills require an evaluation to determine the underlying cause. To prepare for an evaluation with the healthcare provider of your choice, consider this:

1. Is "poor time management" a new problem, or something that has caused stress all of your life?  

2. How is your time management negatively impacting work, home, school or relationships? Be specific. 

3. Do you believe your time management concerns stem from bad habits and choices within your control or from something health or brain related that is out of your control? (focus or memory problems related to medications, illness, hormones, disease, pain etc.)

4. As you await your appointment with the healthcare provider of your choice, use Creating Best Results, to improve your selfcare.  What are you willing to do differently to manage your time more effectively?

Tools

Use the tools listed in FAQ #3 (Worry about everything) with the provider of your choice. You may also find this helpful:

Circle of Life Stress Test

Replace Bad Habits with Coping Skills

Resources in addition to neuropsychological evaluation and cognitive testing

Michigan Rehabilitation Services for employment concerns

Additudemag.com  to learn more about adult ADHD

Consider if educational and ADA accommodations may be applicable 

People pleasing is a coping tool we humans apply when navigating toxic, dysfunctional or angry relationships. Sometimes pleasing others helps us de-escalate dangerous situations.  I do not want you to stop your people pleasing behavior if it is keeping you alive.  Consider these tips as outlined on my People Pleaser Tool pdf:

1. Reality Check: Where is this worry coming from—emotion, logic or wise mind? 

A worry related to pleasing others in response to employment, education, oppression or a dangerous or life-threatening situation is a survival strategy, not a worry problem. List your specific people pleasing worries then do a reality check. Replace fears with facts.

2. Origin- Is this people pleaser worry stemming from childhood trauma, distorted beliefs?

     How old are you when you have this worry—what inner-age is your worry stemming from?

3.  Seek to understand-When was the first time you remember being worried about pleasing someone-- do you have a pattern?   At what age will you be old enough to outgrow the worry about what "those" people think? 

4. Curiosity -At what age do adults focus on living by their own standards, values and beliefs?

5. If the worry is not related to survival or danger, make a list of your people pleasing worries. Once you have completed your list, ask yourself “then what will happen?”

6. Confidence-Would your people pleasing worries be resolved with healthier self-esteem? 

7. Insight-. Would your people pleasing worries benefit from understanding yourself?

8. Apply these additional tools to reduce your worry:

· Is this worry in or out of your control? Work through worries using the map

· Transform the worry into wisdom.

· Reframe the thoughts that keep you awake at night using the Ladder Tool

· Stress Prevention Tests

· Understanding the difference between worry, anxiety and fear may be useful

· Stop “Shoulding” on Yourself Tool 

· Still stuck with obsessive thoughts? Try the Sticky Brain 20/20/20 tool

9. Thoughts . Apply these questions to your “people pleasing” concerns. 

· What are you afraid will happen if you stop "people pleasing"? 

· Are your thoughts aligned with healthy relationship thinking? 

· Does your people pleasing involve reasonable expectations?

· Does people pleasing involve healthy trust?

· Is people pleasing impacted by healthy boundaries or checkers cheating?

· Is people pleasing connected to passivity or aggression?

· How does people pleasing impact the rules for healthy dating?

· Would people pleasing resolve with understanding how to detach with love, and let go?

· Does people pleasing stem from an inability to cope with anger?

· Would people pleasing be reduced if you practiced transforming worry to wisdom?

Bottom line is that you are responsible for your communication, assertiveness and relationships.  You get to decide what works for you and what needs to change. 

10. Align your thoughts and your actions with your values. Are you pleasing yourself by becoming the person you wish to be?